


The Life of a Vampire

by Bitch_In_The_Blue



Series: Red Moon: The Saga of Eileen Shan [2]
Category: Cirque du Freak | The Saga of Darren Shan - Darren Shan
Genre: Betrayal, Canonical Character Death, Coming Out, Depression, F/F, F/M, Family Feels, Implied Sexual Content, Murder, Name Changes, Relationship(s), Resentment, Vampirism, Violence, lgbt protagonist
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-16
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2018-12-03 00:02:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11520300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bitch_In_The_Blue/pseuds/Bitch_In_The_Blue
Summary: Summary is a WIP





	1. Everything Needs To Eat

I watched the vampire closely as he used his sharpened finger nails to cut through the flesh of his kill. Blood seeped over his fingers while he tore muscle from bone; and the red liquid steamed in the cool night air as it dripped into the dirt with a nauseating splash.    
At least she was dead. The hard part was over. I stared at the muscle tissue as it was bared and twitching post-mortem, wondering what it'd taste like.    
"Have you ever had venison before?" Mr. Crepsley asked.   
"No," I replied, staring at the doe's glassy black eyes. She died quickly, and I was relieved that she didn't seem to be in much pain when she did. She didn't struggle much at the end. "But I a lways kinda wondered if it was any good." I was by no means a vegetarian, but the killing part of the process always made me uncomfortable.    
Especially the blood.    
I was a half-vampire now. It'd been a month since Mr. Crepsley dug me up and took me away.    
I hadn't drunk any blood. Not a drop. Not because of my morals, not because of my religious preferences;  but because I just plain didn't like touching blood.    
I was a germaphobe; and Mr. Crepsley often berated me for refusing to drink and suggested that I at least feed off of animals until I was ready for human blood, but the thought made my stomach do backflips.   
I was weaker than I should've been, but I was still stronger than I was before . Mr. Crepsley said the only reason I was still fine was because I was young enough to have extra energy, and because I was only a half-vampire. If I didn't have any human left in me, I probably would've died a few weeks ago.   
"Will you at least drink some of the blood from this deer? It will not sustain you like human blood would, but it will help ."   
"I can't."    
"Why not?"   
"I don't even like to lick my own blood when I got paper cuts, how am I supposed to step up to drinking someone else's? Let alone a wild animal 's . .. "   
"You will have to eventually. If you do not..."   
We lapsed into silence, as we often did. Meanwhile, he continued to butcher the deer by hand and placed the meat into a plastic grocery bag.    
I went back to where we'd set up our camp and began to make a fire. He'd taught me a few things about outdoor survival since I went with him. First came finding shelter and  clean water, then how to build a fire, foraging, and now: hunting.    
I felt like I would have enjoyed hunting if I didn't see the fear in our prey's eyes when it was struggling to get away. Fish didn't bother me, birds didn't bother me- but deer, foxes, and rabbits were what made me uncomfortable with how much more expressive their eyes were.    
I was kind of pathetic for being a creature of the night .    
I was the same gutless loser as I was back home.   
I guess some things just don't change.   
  
Mr. Crepsley joined me once he'd finished and I observed as he stripped the bark off of a couple of sticks and used the bare branches to skewer the meat before offering me one. I took the stick between my fingers, wary of the deer's cooling blood rolling down toward my hands as I held the meat over the flames.    
I stared at the food as it sizzled and dripped its juices into the fire.  My mouth watered in anticipation as the smell hit me. The sound alone reminded me of the last meal I cooked with my mum. I missed her terribly. I missed laughing with her, how she always hugged me so tightly when I was sad or stressed, and how she always gave me the best advice.   
"What are you thinking about?"   
I looked up from the fire once Mr. Crepsley broke the silence.    
"Huh ?"    
"You must be remembering something good if it is making you smile. I almost did not think you were capable of it."   
"Oh," I nodded . I hadn't realized that I was smiling. I wiped the grin right off my face, as if it were illegal to do anything but be serious. " Yeah, it's a good thing..." I went quiet again and he didn't press any further. We hadan unspoken agreement that we didn't talk about my life unless I felt the need to share details; but I doubted that he cared much about my life before I came to work for him. As I've said before: Larten Crepsley was kind of an ass.   
But he was my only friend now.    
I could do worse .  
  
"So when are you going to tell me crazy stories about being a vampire?" I asked one night while we were walking along a dark, forested road. The occasional car would pass us up, tail lights fading into the distance ahead soon after.    
"My life does not contain 'crazy stories'. "   
"You forget how much I already know ." I said wryly. "My dad's written volumes about you, and I know a lot about you already. But I know there's a few things that aren't mentioned- like what happens in between the panels of comic books when the scene changes."   
"I know nothing of 'comic books'."   
"Well yeah- but you know what I mean, right? There's time in between scenes and-"   
"I understand, but what is so important that you wish to know?" He asked irritably. I knew he didn't like that I knew so much about him when he knew almost nothing about me.  He was at a disadvantage.   
"Just- little things. Do you have any funny stories? Things that stick out in your memory as good or meaningful or helped to shape who you are?"   
He looked thoughtful for a moment , and sort of surprised that I asked him that. I didn't think he perceived me as being very smart because of my age, but I surprised him sometimes.   
I looked up to him in a way, and his opinion mattered to me because I wanted him to like me\- especially since he was stuck with me for however long I'd live as his assistant. I liked to think that every day h e saw me as a little bit better than he'd first assumed.    
"I will tell you, if you tell me more about yourself first." He said.    
My mind went blank. "I don't know what to talk about." It was like every year in school on the first day when teachers want introductions. No one ever knows what's good enough to share.   
"Tell me your favorite story from your childhood. Something that shaped you."   
I wracked my brain for a minute, searching for something that changed me- and I remembered.    
"I was pretty normal, I guess," I started. "I used to think there were monsters in my closet or under my bed like a lot of other kids do. But my dad liked to tell me that sometimes things we see as monsters aren't bad at all. So I started trying to make friends with them- I left , like, bits of candy or little bags of crisps at the foot of my bed and outside the closet door." I giggled. "And then mum noticed a bunch of ants in my room." I smiled at the memory. "She did not like that..."   
I saw the vampire crack a quick smile out of the corner of my eye.    
"But even with all that, I still felt like the monsters were out to get me. So my dad made me a sword out of a cardboard box and told me I could fight ' em off. I slept with the sword in my hands and I wasn't scared anymore... I felt like I could protect myself from them."   
"That is a good memory," Mr. Crepsley nodded.    
"Yeah," I nodded. "But then I got older and became afraid of everyday things like going to new places alone or talking to people I liked at school. I was such a  loser." I couldn't help but make fun of myself sometimes. It made some things about myself easier to deal with. Somehow. It made me not take those things so seriously.  "So! What story are you gonna share?"   
"I do not have any stories to share."   
" _OH, COME ON!_ "  
  
We traveled for days on an unknown route and I began to feel like we were going nowhere. Mr. Crepsley suggested that I tell him more about myself to pass the time . So I told him a few things; where I grew up, what things I liked, things that were important to me. Certain boundaries I have. The kind of information that could put us on an even level of familiarity. I talked a lot about Rose. So much so that he began to disengage when I went on about her- I'd apologize when I caught myself doing it.    
" -I just... " I trail off. " We've been together forever, like, since we were born. She was always around, so I never really was lonely or even independent like other kids were... It feels weird to be away from her for this long. "   
He was quiet for a long moment. "Perhaps I was wrong to take you from your home so quickly ," he said. "You are too young and too soft to be a  half- vampire. But it was the only option I could foresee that did not involve killing you. I am sorry for separating you from your life."   
I figured that all of my stories about home reminded him of when he left his home and brought back the feelings associated with it. I thought that maybe, just maybe, he saw a little of himself in me.  Especially because I was as eager to be a good assistant just as he had been when his old mentor, Seba Nile, had taken him in.   
And so I responded the way I thought he wanted to hear. " You did what you thought was the safest. I miss home, and I always will. But I trust your judgment. Mr. Tiny would have done something worse than this anyway... So you can at least make sure yourself that nothing crazy happens. Right?"   
He looked at me for a moment, then nodded. "Yes, he would have. I will do what's necessary to keep him from you ."  
  
We stopped walking just before dawn and made shelter in a heavily forested space. The trees provided plenty of cover from the sun, but I ended up making extra cover by roping the corners of a tarp around some trees. That would save us from any possible rainfall too.   
Mr. Crepsley fell asleep almost right away, but I laid on top of my bed of leaves and stared off into the woods.   
Calm. Shady. Almost dead silent other than the sound of small animals walking over twigs and crunchy autumn leaves. I watched a small rabbit venture close to our camp and I laid as still as I could, not even blinking. And then when it was close enough...  
I whispered "boo!" and the rabbit took off at top speed away from me. I had to cover my mouth to keep from waking up Mr. Crepsley with my giggles. I peered over at the vampire- still sleeping.   
I wasn't tired. In fact, I'd been restless the last few days.   
He wouldn't mind if I wandered off for a bit. I just wouldn't go very far.   
I crept quietly out from under the tarp, brushing bits of leaves off of my dress as I followed the direction the rabbit ran off to and kept an eye out for him again.  
I heard a sharp squeal, and whirled toward the sound, ready to run to get Mr. Crepsley- but I relaxed and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw that the sound came from the now dead rabbit hanging from a fox's jowls. The fox eyed me suspiciously before running off with the rabbit.   
I felt a little sad for the rabbit, but everything needs to eat.   
My stomach growled.  
Everything, including blood-deprived half-vampires, needs to eat.  
Maybe blood wouldn't be too horrible- I mean, I had to get used to it at some point. I didn't want to die from something as easily avoidable as starvation.  
Maybe the fox would sate me for a while...  
 _Circle of life_ , I told myself. Anything to justify the notion of killing an innocent animal for my survival. I just had to do it while I still had the nerve.   
I followed the fox instead now, leaving deep notches in the trees with my fingernails so that I could find my way back to camp with ease. They'd grown thicker and naturally pointed since I crawled out of my grave. Vampires' fingernails and toenails grew thicker and stronger than any human's; and couldn't be cut with regular clippers. I'd ended up biting my fingernails down several times since I noticed them growing. I was afraid I'd cut myself or someone else with them if I wasn't careful enough, but they ended up growing back very quickly and very sharp. Today that would come in handy.  
I followed the fox to a pile of large, mossy rocks. There was a small hole at the bottom where two of the rocks met. I watched the fox trot to the crack where it was met by two of its babies yapping excitedly for food.   
I immediately lost my nerve to kill it, and instead ended up sitting where I was and watching them feed. They watched me with caution, but after a while they decided I wasn't a threat. By then the kits had moved on to playing- cute!  
I leaned against the tree at my back, enjoying the serene moment and letting my eyes close. I'd get up and go back to camp in a minute... I was ready to sleep. I smiled to myself as I listened to the kits yapping playfully at each other. Soon the sound sort of faded, as if it were just background noise like the droning of a machine. I had to fight to open my eyes (had I been sleeping?), and once I did I saw that the fox kits had wandered over to me and were sniffing at my shoes.  
"Hi, babies!"  
  
I laughed as they retreated to their den, tripping over themselves along the way. That was enough adventure for the day.    
I stood up slowly, cracking my neck and back before backtracking to camp. As nice as it was to enjoy the peace, I was ultimately disappointed in myself for not working up the guts to hunt.  I was too soft for this.  
  
"Wake up," Mr. Crepsley ordered and roused me from a deep sleep.    
"Wha..." I groaned, disoriented. I looked up at the tarp and momentarily thought it was the night sky. "We slept past sunset..."   
The vampire scoffed and pulled back the tarp. I winced as the faintest glimmer of the sunset hit my eyes through the tree cover above. I rubbed my eyes and blushed, embarrassed of my rambling. "Sorry, I'm not quite awake yet." I rolled over and stood up to stretch. "Wish I had some coffee..." I muttered, getting to work on packing up our tarp.    
"Well be alert, we have a long night of travel again and I have no need for an assistant who falls behind." Mr. Crepsley said gruffly.    
"I won't fall behind." I grumbled. I saw him look at me out of the corner of my eye as I packed up the tarp and I immediately knew that he thought I was irritable. Truth be told, I was. The need for blood was deeper than ever now that I considered killing to feed.    
But maybe I didn't need to.   
  
"Hey, Mr. Crepsley?" I began sometime after we began walking. We'd cleared the woods and got back to the lengthy road we'd been traveling. " I was doing some thinking today and I think I'm ready to try to drink."   
He glances over at me, brows raised musingly. "Why the sudden change of heart?"   
I shrugged, thinking of the rabbit. "I don't want to die?"    
He chuckled. "Very well," he reached into one his pockets and produced the vial of deep red liquid which he handed to me. "I am pleased that you came to this decision on your  own."   
I stared at the vial and uncorked it, anxious now.   
Maybe I wasn't ready.    
But I didn't want to chicken out- especially because I didn't know how much longer I'd live without it. I've gone a month, I surely could've dropped dead by now. I chalked my survival up to my body still adapting to vampirism for the first couple of weeks while half of my humanity left me.    
_Do not _ _back down_ , I told myself.    
I raised the vial to my lips and very hesitantly took a sip.  
  
I immediately regretted this decision.   
  
My stomach churned and I began to feel lightheaded. I nearly spilled what was left of the vial when I ran over to the edge of the woods, pressed my hands to a tree, and vomited.    
Even after my stomach was empty, I didn't move. I could feel Mr. Crepsley's glare burning into my back.    
_This is hopeless. _  
I didn't want to leave the tree until I steadied myself, but my eyes wouldn't stop tearing up. I choked back a sob as I leaned against the tree. Ashamed.    
Mr. Crepsley's hand on my shoulder caught me off guard and I looked up at him. But he didn't look angry like I thought he was- he looked sympathetic.    
"I 'm... I'm sorry," I said quietly. "I didn't want to waste it. I thought I could do it. Just- knowing it's a person's is... " Vile, disgusting, abhorrent, borderline cannibalistic, etc.   
I looked at him, expecting to see the same hateful glare I suspected before-- but it wasn't there. I had only imagined it. He looked concerned, like when I once told my dad that I was being bullied in school.  "You are not the first half- vampire to be sickened by the thought of blood. And you will not be the last. Perhaps you can handle an animal's blood better ?"   
I nodded, handing back what was left in the vial.  He took it and placed it back into the pocket it came from; and then we silently entered the woods to look for suitable prey.  
  
Again I watched our prey's eyes as it died. Another deer, only this one was a six-point buck.  Mr. Crepsley had swooped down it from a tree, grabbed its antlers, and twisted its neck all in one swift movement. The buck dropped into the dirt with a heavy thud and took its last few wheezing breaths as I climbed down from my hiding spot. As I walked up to the dead animal, I could see my reflection in his glassy black eyes.   
Again, I felt unease- he looked like he was staring at me with a permanent look of fear . Like all animals able to sense when something is wrong or different, the fear in his eyes looked like it was from knowing what  we are .   
"He is all yours," Mr. Crepsley said, gesturing toward the dead animal. "Even if you cannot drink, we will be able to save the meat. Waste not, want not. "   
"I can do it," I assured . I sunk  slowly  down to my knees beside the buck and paused . _I can do this_ _... I can do this I can do this I can do this I can do this-- but not wit h him staring at me like that. _  
So I covered his eyes with one hand and cut the skin on his neck with the other.    
I kept my hand over the buck's eyes, squeezed my own eyes shut, and began to drink his blood.  I grimaced at the salty taste.   
  
 _Just think of it as eating very rare meat_ , whispered a small voice in the back of my head. (My conscience, of course. I Wasn't crazy.)   
And somehow, that made it easier.   
I kept drinking, and I didn't feel sick. In fact, it became easier to keep it down with each gulp; so I kept drinking until I felt full.   
I pulled back from the animal and wiped the blood from my chin, catching a glance at its eyes again. But now that the deed was done, I didn't feel as guilty.   
Mr. Crepsley, who had stood over me at some point, looked pleased that I'd had my fill. "How do you feel?" He asked.   
"Better, sort of, " I croaked as I stood up. "How long is this gonna keep me alive?"   
"Not very long if you cannot do it again," he replied, crouching beside the deer to begin to butcher him. "Vampires must feed a few times a week. This was your first, so you will feel better; but the feeling will not last if you cannot maintain a schedule. And this deer's blood will not keep you alive as long as human blood will. So you must advance quickly. Can you do that?"   
I frowned. My victory was short lived, but it still counted. I could do this again. I just had to keep the same mentality. It's just meat. "I can try."


	2. Going East

Several more days of walking, a few more times I'd fed, and two more times I'd _tried_ to drink human blood; but Mr. Crepsley and  I were still following the same direction .   
"Seriously, where are we going? Do we even have a destination?" I grumbled. I began thinking one morning while I couldn't sleep that we were just wandering aimlessly throughout the world. And not being one for not knowing what to do or where to go, I was beginning to get anxious.   
"We presently do not have a destination," Mr. Crepsley replied gruffly. "Why, is this an issue?"   
"I just want to know where we're gonna end up. Do you have anywhere you wanna go? Can we go somewhere new, or...?"   
"It is your choice."    
With all of the options I could possibly imagine, I almost drew a blank.    
But one place stood out to me; almost instinctually.   
"I want to go to the Cirque Du Freak," I decided. The chance to see the fabled circus of my childhood again, this time up close, was too good to pass up.   
Mr. Crepsley seemed pleased with my choice. He loved the Cirque as much as I did, maybe more. "As you wish."  
  
After he'd homed in on Mr. Tall, Mr. Crepsley and I started our trek to the Cirque's current location.   
"How do we know they'll still be there when we show up?" I asked several days into travel. We'd changed direction from before- previously heading North, but now going East toward another country.   
"They will know we are coming. Hibernius is able to sense when I am seeking him out, just as vampires can." Mr. Crepsley answered. "There is still much you will learn about the clan."  
"I'm sure," I nodded. "I feel like I only know the bare minimum. I forgot a lot of things over time. "  
"Even if that is true, you still know more than many other new vampires. A knowledgeable assistant is one who will stay alive."  
I felt some pride in that. It meant that I would be useful and good to keep around for a long time, which meant that I'd get to stick with Mr. Crepsley for a long time.   
  
We made the next few nights dedicated to walking.    
"Are we going to be on foot the whole time?" I asked, feet aching in my flimsy shoes. They were wearing down from overuse. I'd have to replace them as soon as we arrived- maybe sooner.   
"We will be able to take a bus part of the way once we reach a certain waypoint," my mentor answered.   
Just then, the rubber sole on the heel of my right shoe splits off from the bottom and flops under my foot with each step, like a pair of sandals.   
Mr. Crepsley looks down at my feet as we walk and sighs. "Or perhaps we should stop at the next city and replace those."  
I nod. "New clothes sound nice too. I haven't worn a skirt so long before and it's getting colder out."   
"We will worry about clothes when we reach the Cirque Du Freak. Shoes, for now, are the most important part. We may be refused service on public transport if you were to go barefoot."  
  
A couple nights later, I had bought a pair of cheap canvas shoes. Comfortable, durable, and could withstand the remaining distance ahead (and then some) .    
That made it easier to reach the waypoint Mr. Crepsley had planned out. When we got there, we got on an overnight bus that took us farther East.    
Some of the people on it smelled, and I realized we did too, so I tried to sleep through a big portion of the ride. Mr. Crepsley covered himself with his jacket while he slept, so the sunlight wouldn't reach him through any windows, and I slept leaning against him.    
People often asked where we were going and why we looked so ragged. A few asked why I wasn't wearing a jacket at that time of the year, but the cold didn't really hit as hard as it used to.   
We ended up just telling them we were circus folk. Homeless, wandering, trying to reach our camp. Technically true.   
I grew nervous with each passing night. I was excited to see the Cirque Du Freak, but more nervous than anything else.   
I didn't know anyone there like Mr. Crepsley did.   
What if I didn't make any friends? What if I was too weird?   
Me, weird, to a group of literal circus freaks. What a thought.  
  
The bus ride ended on the third night, very early into the morning before the sun would rise.  
"We are a day's walk from the Cirque Du Freak," Mr.Crepsley said. I could see it in his face that he was hoping I'd cheer up when we got there- and I really hoped I would too. We'd been walking for hours and were tired and sore. Being close was the kind of jump we needed. But try as I might, I couldn't feel the excitement.  I  still  felt  anxious, and it was only getting worse with each step closer.   
"Great," I absently answered. I was thinking of how I'd probably be so awkward in a conversation that they'd just decide not to bother with me.   
"Did you want to just keep walking?" He asked. "I thought you wanted to go."   
"I do." I said. "I'm just not looking forward to introducing myself. I'd skip that part if I could."   
"Why?"   
"Well in case you haven't noticed," I smiled, ready to self-deprecate again. "I'm pretty boring. I'm not going to fit in."   
"The people in the Cirque Du Freak do not fit in either," my mentor noted. "That is why they are all together. And that is why I 'fit in', and why you will too."   
I looked at him, surprised at the encouragement. Seriously, that was one of the most dad-like things he's ever said.   
"You and I are two of a kind to them," he added. "Many of them will want to know about the first and only female half-vampire child they have ever seen."   
Okay, so maybe I wouldn't be entirely boring. At least until anybody got to know me personally. "Well... Let's go see the circus, I hear it's in town."


	3. Just Plain Von.

The Cirque Du Freak was settled on an unkempt, seemingly abandoned farm. Trucks stayed on the nearby road, but trailers had been driven onto the grass and some people had set up inside the rickety-looking barn. No anim als or farmers, just two storeys of rotting wood, a rusty grain silo, a few smaller trailers parked inside where they could fit, and several tents within the structure.  
Several members were setting up a pile of wood as we approached- for a bonfire?  
Most of them looked like regular people, then there was a girl with green, gold, and blue scales covering her body instead of skin. Most of her had been covered with clothes for the cool weather, but I could see that from how she kept tugging at them that they weren't comfortable. I thought she was pretty- with yellow-green braids tied back into a ponytail.   
She noticed me staring, shrugging at me as though to ask what I was looking at.   
I blushed, shrugging back and smiling awkwardly. She ended up smiling back and I felt a little better about being there. Being at a safe place like the Cirque made me feel a little better- Mr. Crepsley was right in thinking that.   
"That is Lilia," Mr. Crepsley said as he walked- I guess he'd noticed the brief exchange. "She is  around  your age. I am sure that you will become fast friends."  
"I hope so," I said quietly, following closely as we stepped up to the barn. As though sensing us, the tallest man in the world emerged from the barn doors, having to bend to step out without hitting his head.   
"Larten" his voice was a low croak as before, with his lips barely moving. "I did not expect you to be rejoining us so quickly." He looked at me with his black eyes, and I would've felt intimidated if I didn't know him at all. "With company." I could see in his expression that he remembered me from when I'd first seen the show.   
"This is Eileen. My assistant." Mr. Crepsley said. "She requested that we return here for some time."  
"Is that so?" Mr. Tall asked.   
"Yes." I said, nodding once. I felt like he was reading me. I knew he was somewhat psychic, but just how much...?  
"I am pleased that you would consider this a safe haven." Mr. Tall said. "Any friend of Larten's is a friend of ours. But, there is of course a minor stipulation. You will be required to work."  
I smiled thinly. "I'll earn my keep." I said. "Just-- I'd like to not be the one to feed the wolf-man." I wasn't about to lose some fingers!  
"It is a deal," he offered his hand to me- much larger than mine- and I shook it. "I have prepared sleeping arrangements for you both. You will be sharing space- we are somewhat overmanned. Space is limited, so I apologize for the inconvenience."  
"It is not an issue," Mr. Crepsley said. "We have shared space up until now."  
"I d on't have a problem with it," I agreed.  
Mr. Tall nodded. "Very well." He looked away, and my gaze followed to see a young man much like the girl I saw earlier- covered in scales in any visible areas of skin, his hair was yellow-green and styled into shoulder length dreadlocks. He, like his sister, was odd looking, of course...  
_ Bu _ _t still not half bad to look at..._   
Was that weird? Being attracted to a snake-man? I don't know why I even asked, it was pretty friggin' weird.  
"Arlo, will you please show Larten and Eileen to their quarters?" Mr. Tall's voice never rose above the low tone from when he spoke to us, but the snake-man heard him somehow from where he was before and came over to us.   
"Yeah, sure ," he said. "Hey, Mr. Crepsley," he greeted the vampire, receiving only a polite nod in response. He looked to me, eyes widening slightly when we made eye contact.  A look I'd only seen a few boys and girls give me when I was in school.  "Oh-" he said. "Hey, are you together?"  
"Yeah," I grinned- feeling like a fool for it. The way he looked at me was making me nervous; to say the least. But in a good way.  Fluttery.  I felt my cheeks becoming pink. I hoped he didn't notice.   
"She is my assistant," Mr. Crepsley answered. "I am sure that the two of you will become acquainted later. For now, I believe we should rest. We have been traveling for quite some time."  
"Ah- right," the reptilian man said, motioning further into the barn. "Right this way."  
  
Our trailer was against the farthest back corner of the barn, in complete shade from the sun at all times of the day for sure. It was small, but it'd fit both of us just fine. It was rusted in several spots on the outside. Old. Even from outside I could smell that it was sort of musty- but I was sure that a little cleaning up would help it.   
"Yeah, sorry about the condition it's in. It's the only one we have empty right now." Our guide told us.  He'd taken a few glances as me while he walked us over. I did the same.  
"There have been worse places to rest." Mr. Crepsley nodded. "Has Hibernius moved my coffin into here?"  
"Yeah, there's two in there."  
"Good. Thank you." Without another word, my mentor walked inside and shut the door, ready to get to sleep.   
I, however, wanted to stay awake a little longer. "What did you say your name was again? Arlo? "  
The snake-man smiled. " Yeah,  Arlo Von. Just plain Von- nothing after."  
Arlo... Instead of Shancus?   
"And you ?" He asked.   
"Oh-" I almost forgot my own name for a moment. How embarrassing! "Eileen. Shan."  
"Nice meeting you," he said. "Are you a- uh... Vampire?"  
I wasn't surprised that he knew. I figured most people at the Cirque knew since I came with Mr. Crepley- \- hence the darkened sleeping arrangements.   
"Half," I nodded.   
"You know... I'm kinda surprised. I mean- you don't look like a vampire."  
I couldn't help but laugh a little. "What do you think vampires look like, then? Fangs? Capes? _Sparkles_ _? _ "  
"Nono-" He said, looking apologetic. He might have thought that I was offended. "I just thought you were too pretty to be, like, undead or whatever..." He trailed off, noticeably embarrassed at the assumption.   
Oh wow, he's flirting with me-   
"Oh, I'm pretty?"    
"Well-- yeah. Sorry. That was pretty dumb to say, I'm not good at-- Yeah."  
I laughed- hard enough to double over.  "Vampires aren't actually undead. I'm alive, I have a  pulse. But thank you--  You're kinda pretty yourself!"  
"Hey, I'm _foxy_ , get it straight," he snickered, pretending to be vain and running a hand through his hair.   
I couldn't help but utter a girly little giggle.   
Yikes, it was like I was back in school.   
  
We ended up  standing around together outside the trailer, just conversing comfortably. I didn't dare unload what'd happened since I was blooded, so I talked about the small things in between. Arlo was fun to talk to, and was very intelligent and  genuinely  kind. I asked him a lot about what his life had been like- I especially wanted to know because his future was taken so abruptly in another life. He was twenty. Born nearly a year after Dante. I was happy knowing that he'd grown up to have a good life with his family.  
I was surprised when he asked to know more about me- I felt so mundane compared to someone like him. But when I told him where I used to live, he lit up. "Hey, we were just there a while ago. I liked it out there."  
"I was at the show," I grinned. "It was the best show I ever saw; you and your family were amazing." And it was true- it was the best show I'd ever seen and it always would be.   
He shuffled his feet and his smile never fell, flattered by the compliment even though I was certain he'd heard it many times before from others. "Thanks, we always like hearing that people enjoy seeing us... Hey, you should come have dinner with us sometime. We all sit together and cook outside every night. We get some family time, we listen to music, it's great."  
My heart quickened, and I felt like a little kid with a crush for the first time . I mean- it's not like h e asked me on a date, but... I dunno, it felt exciting. "I'd like that. It's been a long time since I hung out with someone within a hundred years of my age." I tapped my hand on the side of the trailer. "I'll join you tomorrow night. For now-- I'm really, really tired ."  
He chuckled. "I hear you; get some rest."  
As I stood up and stepped into the trailer, Arlo was on his way away, a dding a  "see you later"  before he was gone.  
I had a hard time falling asleep the big, dumb smile on my face and anxious beating in my chest .  
  
I took a long shower in the trailer while the sun was going down the next evening- I had been given new clothes as soon as I woke up. Nothing strange like a pirate costume, like I'd  half- expected; some new socks and black boots (steel toe, I'd noticed when I put them on), clean undergarments, a pair of jeans that were a little too loose for me, a belt (thankfully), and a T-shirt  screen  printed with 'Cirque Du Freak' and a logo of Madam Octa.  
  
Cool !

Once I was clean and dressed, I finally took a look in a mirror- I hadn't done that in a while. My long hair was still wet and dangled down the sides of my head to my chest, where water spots spread out from where the wet locks laid against my T-shirt. I wish I knew how to actually style my hair. And I wish I still had my makeup bag. I wanted to look like I didn't climb out of a grave to walk around for a few months.  
  
Ugh, why was I so nervous!?  
I've gone on dates before, I've had boyfriends before--   
I guess it's just been a long time.  
  
I sat for a few more minutes, closing my eyes and internally assuring myself that I'd have fun before I got up and headed for the door.   
Mr. Crepsley was still asleep- and would probably stay that way now that he was comfortable in his coffin.   
"Are you coming to eat?" I asked, hand on the door handle.   
"I do not want to wake up for a few more hours." He grumbled- understandable. The only reason I was willing to wake up was because I wanted to eat. I'd come back for a nap.   
I sighed, stretching out and cracking my neck and back before I headed for the door. Ready to hopefully make a good impression.  
  
The Vons were a wonderful family. Evra and Merla were great hosts- offering me any food they'd made and then some. I ate ravenously, going back for seconds and even thirds- we had skipped a lot of meals while we traveled. Whatever we ate was dried, foraged, or hunted; and eating something other than venison and squirrel felt like a luxury.  
"At least somebody likes my cooking!" Lilia, my new friend, beamed as I threw my paper plate into the bonfire. According to Arlo, campfires were a nightly thing. Several fires, surrounded by varying groups of freaks and staff alike, in a cluster in the massive open space they always made room for.   
"It's so gooooood!" I said, savoring the aftertaste of tinfoil wrapped veggies and slices of sausage. "I haven't had a real dinner in weeks! I really appreciate you sharing with me- thank you so much."  
Merla let out a small, appreciative laugh. "Oh, sweetie, please- it's a pleasure to have you. You're welcome to have dinner with us any time."  
"Yeah, especially when  _Lilia_ tries to cook," Urcha said. He was the eighteen year old middle child and the only Von man to have his mother's dark skin instead of his father's scales, and he wasn't much of a talker. He spoke up when he had something to say. Otherwise seemed to very comfortably keep to himself.  
"I'm working on it!" Lilia snapped, giving her older brother a slap on the arm and earning a laugh from her older brothers. She was sixteen and close to seventeen. She leaned toward me, brushing her long ponytail behind her shoulder. "They're so ungrateful. Do you have any brothers?"  
"I have one," I smiled thinly, feeling weight in my chest when I remembered the last time Dante and I got to hang out.  
"Oh-" her expression dropped when she saw the strain in my response. "I'm sorry, I know that's probably a sensitive subject..."  
"It's okay," I definitely wasn't okay. The wound was still fresh. "I know you didn't mean anything by it."  
"How old are you, Eileen?" Evra asked, looking up from his own plate of food.  
"Seventeen."  
"Really young for a vampire."  
I nodded. "Definitely- but I'm only half. I assume Mr. Crepsley will make me into a full vampire once he thinks I'm ready. Maybe a few decades from now."  
"That's a long wait," Arlo said.  
"I have a long life ahead if I do everything right."  
A very, very long life. Who knows how old I'd live to be? A century? Five centuries?  
I remembered the ancient Prince named Paris Skyle- who I think was rumored to be nearly a thousand years old.  
"That's sooooo cool," Lilia said. "Being young and pretty for decades and decades..."  
"It has its drawbacks- like probably getting acne for decades and decades!"  
  
One by one, the Vons left the fire to go to bed until just me and Lilia remained at the fire. She asked a lot about what life was like before the Cirque, just like Arlo had earlier that day. I told her the same things I'd told him.  
"Your family sounds so nice," she said sadly. "I'm sorry you had to leave them."  
"I am too," I faked a smile, staring downtrodden into the fire. My face was hot with how long I'd sat there. But it felt great compared to the chill in the air around us.  
"You can just be part of our family from now on," the snake-girl said. "Everybody loves you so far. Especially Arlo," she teased.  
I had to scoot away from the fire so that my face and ears wouldn't feel so hot- especially now that I knew I was blushing. "He's cool," I said idly. "Seems nice."  
"He likes you, I can tell."  
I spluttered, not sure how to respond other than: "we just met!"  
She giggled at me, patting me on the shoulder as I tried to turn away to hide the redness on my face. She knew I sort of liked him too. Was it that obvious?  
"Oh! Pfft--  _Shut up!_ " I couldn't help but laugh along with her and play-slap her hand off my shoulder.   
Mr. Crepsley was right.  
We became friends in an instant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why yes, Merla is black.  
> The Von kids are mixed and they're all beautiful.  
> I don't make the rules anywhere but here. :^)


	4. Circus Folk

I was assigned a few odd jobs throughout the Cirque Du Freak and worked hard each day.   
First: I was on the day shift for now. Sleep was hard on the first night. I had been nocturnal for nearly two months and grew used to waking when the sunset hit my face and forced me out of my dreams.  
But I got into the swing of things two weeks into living with the Cirque.  
Five in the morning: wake up, get dressed, throw some raw meat to the Wolf-Man (I nicknamed him 'Grady').  
Six in the morning: sweep out his cage from a distance while hde was distracte and try to ignore the horrible smell.  
Six thirty: hunt small mammals to feed to the Von family's snakes with Lilia and Arlo.  
Seven: Help make and distribute breakfast, then help with the dishes.  
Nine: Gut pieces of the abandoned barn to use as firewood with Urcha and Arlo. They asked me to help because I was physically stronger than the two of them combined. Which, funny enough, made me feel cool because I had impressed Arlo.  
Noon: Break time! A different group of people prepare, serve, and clean up after lunch.  
Two: Throw leftover food to the Wolf-Man. He was becoming used to my face and knew me as his new food source. I still didn't like going around him and kept more than twice his arms' length from the cage at all times. I wasn't about to lose my hands to a dangerous creature like him.  
Three: Quietly sweep and dust the inside of mine and Mr.Crepsley's trailer while he sleeps.   
Five: Dinner time. A third shift prepares this meal, and I'm finally done for the day. I join the Vons at their campfire and have dinner with them. We share stories, joke- I notice Arlo glance at me often. I did the same. I felt that obnoxious fluttery feeling each time.  
 _He made me nervous!_  
Five thirty: The sun sets and Mr. Crepsley leaves the trailer. I excuse myself to go with him most nights.  
We hunt for game animals. Foxes, rabbits, birds, and deer whenever we can find one. We end up giving the meat to staff and they have someone butcher it so that we all can eat it.  
But before we pass it on to them, I cut open a vein and drink the blood.   
"Do not drink it all," My mentor says. "I have an idea."  
  
I watched as he bottled the remaining blood from the deer. He hadn't told me any more about his idea, no matter how much I asked. He just bottled the blood and tucked it away into his equally red jacket.  
We brought our kill back to the Cirque, handed it off to the designated butcher, and by eight, I was exhausted and ready to relax. The work day was over.  
I took a quick shower in our trailer, put on clean clothes, and was in the middle of lying in my coffin until-  
"Knock, knock!" A voice accompanied the rapping on the door.  
I groaned sleepily as I dragged myself out of my coffin and to the door to answer.  
I found Arlo on the other side, his breath steaming in the cold winter air. The Cirque Du Freak moved further north a week ago, and I drove our trailer to the new location. It was colder here, and we were dusted with a light snow several times since we came.  
"Hey," the snake-man said through shivers and clicking teeth. I think the scaly Von's were mostly cold-blooded, so the cold made them sluggish, weary, and shivery. Snakes hibernated in the winter. Being human along with it must've been confusing on a physiological level.  
"Hey yourself," I smiled. "You're freezing, did you wanna come in?"  
"I was actually gonna ask if you wanted to come watch a movie-- Were you about to go to bed?"  
"I was," I glanced down at my wrinkly sweatpants and oversized hoodie. I looked like a gray and blue trash bag but he never seemed to judge.  
I was so tired.  
But movie night with the family sounded good.  
I missed doing that.  
"I am in the mood for a movie, now that you mentioned it."  
I put back on my boots and followed Arlo through the snow until we came to his family's RV.  
I had been inside a couple of times before. It was one of the types with a loft above the driver's seat, a room in back behind a door, and two spots in the living area that could be made into beds- a couch and a table.  
Evra and Merla got the room with the door, Lilia slept in the converted table so that she could lie near her sick snake's tank, Urcha slept on the fold out bed from the couch because he was too tall to take any other spot, and Arlo got the loft.  
That's where we settled in to watch the movie after ditching our boots and his coat.  
"Everyone's asleep," I whispered. "I thought they were going to watch with us."  
"Too tired," he said back quietly. "And we're gonna be up early tomorrow to move the Cirque again. So it's just me and you tonight."  
 _Oh._  
I really did not know where this was going... Our friendship, I mean.  
But I did want to find out.  
So I nodded, kicked off my boots, and made myself comfortable on the edge of his bed.   
He laid next to me, keeping a slight distance to give me some room; both of us on our stomachs, holding onto pillows as we huddled around the portable DVD player he set on the sheets with us.  
Just comfortable, pleasant time alone together.  
I hadn't heard of the movie we watched before, it was some straight to DVD indie movie, but it was funny. I had to bury my face into his pillow to keep from laughing and waking anyone up.  
  
I didn't remember much of how the movie ended, because it was morning when I opened my eyes again. I'd fallen asleep next to Arlo in his bed and woke to see that we were both still lying on our stomachs and facing the now black screen of the DVD player. Still the same distance from each other.  
"Wake up, love birds!" Urcha suddenly popped up at the edge of the loft and scared both of us awake. Arlo even yelped and nearly fell out of bed onto his brother, who stepped back with raucous laughter. "It's moving day!"  
" _Wooooow, really?_ " Arlo asked irritably, voice groggy and dehydrated when he chucked a pillow at his younger brother. Urcha didn't have the same sleep problems in the winter time. He was human. "Ass."  
  
I used to be afraid of driving any vehicle larger than a standard sedan, but now I was a master at driving the truck that towed mine and Mr. Crepsley's trailer.  
I inspected the hitch to make sure it was firmly attached, just like how Urcha showed me to do, and then I went inside to make sure everything was fastened down for travel. Mr. Crepsley would stay asleep until the sun set. We had a long drive ahead of us.  
I got behind the wheel of the truck, and was the third vehicle to start moving. All I had to do was follow.  
  
We stopped often, whether for bathroom breaks, food breaks, refueling, or to stretch and make sure everyone was still alert behind the wheel. It'd been several hours, and was now late afternoon. The sun was beginning to set in the winter sky, so I ended up waking Mr. Crepsley so he could provide company during the rest of the drive. I was starting to get tired, so talking would help.  
"You mentioned something about an idea yesterday," I said, passing him a plastic bag with some food from our last rest stop. He nodded and, in exchange, passed me a bottle of blood.  
I glanced away from the road to look at it. Just a regular, clear bottle as usual. Blood from the deer we'd killed.  
"You are tired. Drink first," he said while he popped open a small bottle of orange juice I'd gotten for him. "It will help you stay awake longer."  
I shrugged and passed it to him. "Can you open it up for me?"  
After he passed it back, I took a sip of the lukewarm blood. I hated drinking it when it wasn't fresh. It tasted like sucking on a corroded penny.  
The taste was different from usual. Slightly sweeter. It sort of reminded me of a perfectly ripened cherry tomato. But salted and metallic, still.   
"This is different," I said flatly, trying not to think about it too much as I downed the rest of the bottle. I'd rather have it benefit me and not think about it than think about it and starve. But I had my suspicions.  
"I am surprised that you can taste the difference. Many younger vampires cannot."  
I frowned. "Is this human?"  
"Half," he stated. "If I cannot get you to drink straight human blood, I must help you wean yourself off of animal blood. It will not sustain you the same as that of a human."  
" _Oh god_ ," I sighed haplessly. Disgusted. Yet, shockingly, not nauseous. It was like how my parents got me to once try eating cauliflower stalks after telling me they were potato pieces. "Well... It worked. It was a good idea."  
"Good," he said. "Then I can worry less."  
" _Awwww, you care about me!_ " I teased, reaching over and lightly shaking his shoulder. A glance over proved that he was red in the face. Not used to admitting something like this to someone he hadn't known as long as others.  
"It is appropriate for a mentor to care for an assistant. You have my own blood in your veins. I will not see it wasted."  
I shot him a cocky smirk. "Want me to start calling you my Dad?"  
"NO."  
"Booooo, you're no fun," I laughed, feeling significantly more energized now that I'd drunk. So this is what human blood did. I felt healthy. Invincible. "But thanks. I feel a lot better already. I can live a little longer."  
He nodded, leaning against the car door and staring out the window at the passing view. We were on our way out of a small, rural town. "How have you been feeling?" He asked.  
"Emotionally or physically?"  
"Either. Both."  
"Not great, but better." I paused for a second. "Do you think maybe... I could learn combat?"  
"You want to learn to fight?"  
"That's what we do, right?" I asked. "We fight and defend ourselves. Vampires fight for fun. Right?"  
"Yes," he agreed. "I am just surprised that you want to learn. You do not seem like much of a fighter."  
"All the more reason to learn. And I think it'll make me feel less... helpless, you know? I feel like I have to stick close to you or I'll never stand a chance."  
"We can begin once we reach our destination."   
"Cool," I smiled. "Hey, can you find something on the radio? Music helps." I motioned to the controls and described the basics to him.  
He wordlessly turned the volume up to a better level and pressed 'seek' until clear sound came through. Pop music would have to do.  
"Is this alright?"  
"For as long as we can put up with it," I said. "Thanks,  _Daaaaaad_."  
He nodded an 'Mhm' before realizing what he'd acknowledged, then shot me a dirty look; which I returned with an idiotic grin.  
I had a long giggle fit after he told me to shut up.  
  
My old life felt so long ago now.  
But I still thought about it every day. It took real effort to keep memories at bay, and more effort to keep emotions away.   
But I was dealing.  
I was ready to try to be better.


	5. Night Off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did end up skipping a lot of time in this chapter. Mainly because I want to further the plot.

"You will have to be better than this if you want to live!" Mr. Crepsley scolded, observing as I wiped blood and sweat from under my left eye.   
Two years had gone by since we started, and I didn't seem to be much better.  
"We have been over this," my mentor sighed. "What is the problem?"  
"I'm  _tired!_ " I argued. "You'd be tired too if you were half human and got the crap beaten out of you every single day for two years!" I spat blood into the dirt. "You! Are!  _Killing me!_ "  
"An enemy will not be as merciful," he said flatly. "You know that. We have had this same conversation every other week."  
"Then maybe it's time for a break so I stop bringing it up," I retorted, standing upright and feeling my knees creak with my sluggish movement. "I'm taking the rest of the night off!"  
"Fine," he said impatiently, picking up my discarded knife. He'd knocked it out of my hand before flooring me. We'd moved on to weapons training last year, resulting in less bruising, but more scarring. "You will have the night off. But do not complain when you have to work twice as hard to get back into routine."  
"Ooooohhhh, believe me! I won't!"   
He turned away from me with a roll of his eyes; and I flipped him the bird behind his back.  
Why did he have to be such a hard ass  _all of the time?_  
  
"You look like you went through a cheese grater," Lilia said, seeing the fresh pink, blue, purple, and red marks on my back along with the other more faded ones. Now that I was learning armed combat, Mr. Crepsley didn't think twice about fighting me seriously. I got beaten down often, but he said I was persistent, and that would help me in the long run.   
I pulled off my torn and bloodied shirt. It wan't destroyed, per se. Just had a lot of holes, streaks of dried blood, and permanent stains from the dirt whenever I fell. I stitched it frequently to keep it together. Lilia often lent me clean clothes in between sparring so that I wouldn't start to smell.  
She and I were alone in mine and Mr. Crepsley's trailer. He was out for a walk in the full moon. I was getting ready to take a shower and wash off the blood on my new cuts.  
"Thanks, I _feel_  like I went through a cheese grater. Been getting more scrapes and bruises every day.  
It was July- not long after my twentieth birthday.  
Mr. Crepsley kicked my ass on a nightly basis until I got good enough at fighting to where it was only every two out of three times instead. And then every one in three.  
And then it was more like... Maybe every one in five times?  
I couldn't be sure, because all I could think of by then was how much I desperately needed to sleep.  
"I caught a glimpse of you two," Lilia said. "You're getting to be really good! You can move so fast now..."  
Probably because I habitually drank human blood without wanting to puke. Undiluted. I felt powerful-- but it was still nothing compared to what I could be when I would someday be a full vampire, so I couldn't let it get to my head.  
"Mr. Crepsley doesn't seem to think so," I muttered, kicking off my boots and wiggling out of my dirty jeans. He never had anything good to say. " _'You are not fighting hard enough,'_ " I mimicked his accent. " _'You would be killed if this were real.'_ Give me a break! A 'good job' would be pretty nice to hear once in a while."  
The scaly girl giggled at my impression of my mentor and tossed me a clean towel from where it was draped over my open coffin.  
"Hey, I'm about to go help prep breakfast for the morning. You wanna come? You don't have to do anything but we can still just hang out."  
"I'll come help for a while," I said through gritted teeth, twisting side to side to crack my back. My cuts were closing, but still stung because the skin was red and irritated. "Got nothin' else to do. I'll meet you over there."  
"See you in a bit," she said, opening the door and shrieking.  
I jumped and my head shot in the direction of the door- spotting a glance at Arlo having been walking past my door, I assumed, right as Lilia slammed it back shut.  
"Arlo!" Lilia scolded through the closed door. "Why were you sneaking up here!?"  
" _Sneaking!?_ " We heard him shout through the door. "I walked over here normally and was gonna knock!  _You're_ the one ripping doors open!"  
"God-- _I'm kinda getting undressed in here!_ " I groaned.  
"Sorry!"   
This was the most interaction I'd had with him in weeks.  
  
Lilia and I had remained friends through Arlo and I dating and subsequently breaking up.   
We were together for a year, and it was my first adult relationship.  
I was the one to end it- because the thought of him aging while I stayed the same had scared me. We were getting serious. He said something once about how he'd imagined himself having kids someday. Something I couldn't do and didn't want to deprive him of. I couldn't even grow old with him if we had stayed together. It may have been my low self-esteem doing the talking, but I felt like he deserved someone better than me. I   
Urcha was still friendly after the fact too, but would always opt to spend time with his brother. I didn't blame him, it's what I would've done. The Vons had no resentment toward me from what she said, but Arlo hadn't spent more than a minute around me since then despite his sister telling me that he wasn't upset about it anymore. That was almost a year ago. I figured Lilia told me that to protect my feelings.   
Part of me wished she hadn't- I could handle the truth. Of course I could.   
I wanted to patch things up with Arlo. I wanted to be friends more than anything in the world. But I didn't know how to speak to him about it now that I'd blown it.   
He loved me. And I loved him too.  
He often sat outside of his trailer in a fold out chair and read. The Incredible Hulk was his favorite. I once joked that it was because they were both green and didn't wear shirts all that often.  
I saw him as soon as I left the Vons' trailer a few days later- his and Urcha's was parked close by. They'd taken to living together and out of their parents' trailer.   
Today he was sitting outside in a lawn chair, enjoying the sunshine and reading a magazine with his snake draped around his shoulders; just soaking up some sun. I paused for a moment when the idea came to talk to him- but I kept walking.   
He didn't want to talk to me. I know he didn't.   
How'd I know?  
Because as soon as he glanced up and saw me, I just barely smiled at him, and he looked back to his magazine and didn't look back up- as though I wasn't there.   
My feelings were hurt. But I accepted it.   
I'd hurt him before, so I felt like I deserved the silent treatment.   
He'd talk to me again when he was ready, and I wouldn't bother him until then.   
Until then... I'd keep feeling like an asshole.   
Nothing new by this point.    
  
Mr. Crepsley was asleep when I got back to our trailer.   
I dropped into my coffin and breathed a muffled groan as soon as I hit my pillow face-first.  
"You seem to be in a mood." Mr. Crepsley muttered.   
I turned over to talk to him. "Did I wake you?"  
"I woke when I heard the door open."  
"Sorry. I'm not in any mood, I'm fine."  
He chuckled. "You are fine when you are complaining about how sore and tired you are. When you are quiet, it is  _excruciatingly_ obvious that you are not fine."  
"Well I  _am_ sore, so thanks a lot for the ass kicking today!" I said shortly. "See? I'm fine." I crossed my arms, letting my eyes close so I could fall asleep- or at least try to fall asleep.   
I could hear the fabric of his clothes and the inside of the coffin rustle as he turned over for comfort. "Am I correct in assuming that you would tell me if something was wrong?"  
"What's there to go wrong?"  
He sighed.   
"Seriously, what can _possibly_ go wrong now?" I asked. "I have nothing to keep me from my goals. It's just you, me, and a lot of fighting. Like it always should've been."  
"You have seen Arlo again, then?"  
My chest went tight. "Yeah..."   
My mentor and I had gotten a better understanding of each other since I'd first joined him. We were more or less friends now.   
So he didn't pry any further.   
"You may have tonight to rest again. We will go out for blood instead."  
  
Blood didn't bother me anymore- finally. It'd been months since I was last nauseated by it, and I hadn't even noticed the change until Mr. Crepsley once pointed it out.   
"How do you feel?" My mentor asked as I pulled away from our unconscious donor and licked the remaining liquid from my lips.   
"Like I could fight a bear," I smiled while he closed the cut on sleeping woman's arm. She had car keys in her hand when we incapacitated her, so we'd lock her safely in her car once we were through.  
"One step at a time," Mr. Crepsley chuckled. He carefully picked up the sleeping woman and I took her keys.   
The buttons on her remote unlocked a nearby minivan, and I reclined the driver's seat before he sat her inside. I put the keys on her lap and locked the doors manually before we closed her in.   
She'd wake up in about fifteen minutes thinking she fell asleep in the parking lot. Overall unharmed.   
We headed back to the Cirque Du Freak, a couple of miles away. Just us, the long stretch of forested road ahead, and the full moon tonight.   
"It's such a nice night," I noted, sliding my hands into the pockets of my hoodie. My fingers grazed the small flask I'd filled from the woman before I drank.   
The 'you look like I could use a drink' engraved into the front was especially humorous now that I kept blood inside. There were times where I'd just look at it and smile, remembering the night it was given to me. My eighteenth birthday, about two years ago... From Arlo.   
"It is a nice night," Mr. Crepsley agreed. "Nice enough for-" he paused.   
"For what?" I asked, looking over to him. He seemed to be listening for something. "What?"  
He motioned for me to be quiet, and we walked on in silence. I knew my mentor well enough to know when he was expecting something to happen.   
Someone was following us. I knew it. I scanned the tree line and into the dark depth of the woods to see if I could find someone trying to sneak up on us.   
I slowly began to reach for the knife on my belt...  
" _Hey!_ " A loud, excited voice shouted behind our backs. I yelped, training instinctively kicking in as I whipped my knife out of the sheath and slashed at our assailant-  
But they grabbed my wrist in midair and squeezed until I was made to drop the blade onto the asphalt.   
"Honestly, kids these days," the man simpered, letting me go. "No respect for anyone."  
I hadn't bothered to look him in the face until then- he was stocky and sort of short- built like a wrestler and had messy brown hair and warm brown eyes. He'd be an average looking man if it weren't for the scars all over his face.   
"You are one to judge," Mr. Crepsley rolled his eyes. "Sneaking up on me has never worked in the past, yet you have the nerve to think that I am slipping."  
I shot the strange man a dirty look for scaring me and picked up my knife, sliding it back into the sheath.   
" _She_ sure jumped outta her skin!" The man laughed.   
"Ass." I muttered under her breath.  
Mr. Crepsley was unable to stifle a chuckle. "You reacted swiftly," he told me. "This is my assistant, Eileen Shan. Eileen, this is a close friend of mine. Gavner Purl- who you almost certainly would have killed just now if he did not have vampiric speed."  
I didn't realize that I'd gasped softly until Gavner gave me a simpering look. "My reputation precedes me, I see," he grinned, ignoring Mr. Crepsley saying that he hadn't mentioned him at all to me yet. "Lovely to meet such a pretty young lady like y-"  
"Compliments aren't gonna make me forget how you just tried to jump me for some laughs." I cocked an eyebrow at him.  
" _And_ she's about as fun as you are!" He hooted, looking at Mr. Crepsley, who nodded. "Larten never spends time around fools. Good to meet you," he offered me a hand. "Sorry for that, I just wanted to see for myself what you were like. You seem like a good assistant. Always on the lookout."  
I nodded and shook his hand. "Uh, thank you," I chuckled. Truthfully I was excited to meet Gavner- the man Mr. Crepsley had raised and made into a vampire. That made him almost like my brother. "Mr. Crepsley tells me to-"  
"If you are done trying to read her, may I ask why you have come all the way out here?" Mr. Crepsley asked. "Surely you are not here just to flirt- badly, I might add- with my, clearly very young assistant." I'd make fun of him for that protective father attitude later.  
"I'm actually here to give you some news," Gavner said, more seriously. I noted that he stood up with his back straighter when he was being serious. Something I didn't think was written anywhere. "Paris Skyle has died."  
  
Mr. Crepsley had refused to speak more about the subject until we'd gotten back to the Cirque and gone into our trailer. We sat at the collapsible table- well, they did. I sat on the couch just behind where my mentor was. Gavner began to give the details of Paris's death. He'd died with honor, going out into the wild and fighting a bear, as he'd seen himself do in a dream.   
I wasn't surprised. It was how he'd died before. I was relieved to know that he died because he'd chosen that it was his time, instead of in a tragedy.   
"I do not understand. Why come to tell me?"  
"Because they're looking to choose a new prince. The clan still looks to _you_ as leadership."  
"I have made it clear that I will not-"  
"They want to choose the first vampaneze prince. A special electoral council is being held for it."  
My mentor went silent.   
"What are you talking about?" I asked. "What's he talking about? The vampaneze aren't... They don't..."  
"Do you remember when I told you that the vampaneze are not a threat to us anymore?"  
"Uhhh... _Nooooooo?_ "  
"It was one night during combat training. You asked who I was referring to whenever I mention 'enemies'."  
"It's ringing a bell now."  
"The vampaneze are largely not considered a threat anymore because their ranks have formed an alliance with the vampire clan."  
I chuckled. "You're messing with me _again_. You are such a-"  
He shook his head. "It was perhaps thirty years ago that the alliance was forged. It is still... shaky, to say the least. Many vampires and many vampaneze still oppose the merge, and many of them act out against each other. But the leadership of both sides, as well as the majorities of other influential members of both sides, believe that we should remain merged. And now, they are coming into our chain of command to ensure unity."  
I looked past him at Gavner, looking for any hint that he wasn't being serious.   
They were being serious. The corners of my mouth fell when the information kicked in.  
The vampires and the vampaneze were _really_ joined together...?  
"That's amazing..." I marveled. "How did they come together at all?"  
"Do you know of the Lady of the Wilds?"  
Lady of the... "Evanna?" I asked.  
It dawned on me that she was pregnant at the end of the previous timeline, and had mixed vampire and vampaneze blood in her baby... Or was it babies? Twins?  
... What about here and now?  
"Yes," Mr. Crepsley said. "Evanna had children who merged the clans by becoming the bridge between the two."  
"Wow..." I muttered.   
"What I do not understand is why you have come to notify me of the election  _personally_. That is not a short journey to take for something as trivial as a single vote."  
"Because, _personally_ , I don't like this." Gavner said. "I don't like the idea of our cultures entirely merging. We'll lose who we are- all of our history, our customs, their history, their customs. Because they'll expect us to bend to their will in more ways than just letting them have an equally authoritative position. We want everyone there so that the entire clan's voice is heard. I know you have a stance on this. We need you with us on our side."  
"This is starting to sound a little bigoted..." There was a long silence after I'd said that, both vampires thinking hard about whether or not they felt that this was true. One thing stood no matter which era in which timeline: The vampires and vampaneze held longstanding grudges against each other. And it showed.  
Mr. Crepsley was the first to speak. "She is right. If it is time to merge our leadership, then it is time. I will not fight against this. My stance is irrelevant compared to what the Clans and the Princes believe is the right thing to do; but we cannot make this choice out of fear or hatred of the vampaneze. It must be a step _forward_."  
"Then help to ensure that a vampaneze who will be a _fair_ and cooperative leader gets the throne. If you won't fight the change, then make sure that the next guy in charge is the right fit for both clans."  
"The vampaneze are honor bound, just like us." I interjected. "To say that one side hates the other enough to choose a wrongful leader is to say that the other side would do the same. That's an insult to us, just as much as it is to them."  
Gavner paused, thoughtful. He sighed, finally speaking again. "She's smart, Larten. Insightful... But look, you care about the future of the Clan. I know you do." He looked to me. "Do _you?_ "  
"Yes. Obviously."  
"That's why you, her, and all the others in good standing are needed. If we don't take part, we make the clan look bad."  
Mr. Crepsley sighed as well and rubbed his scar thoughtfully. He shook his head, then looked over his shoulder to me. "It seems that we will have to continue our training at Vampire Mountain."


	6. Respect

We carried on moving through the tunnels of Vampire Mountain, eventually coming to the tall gate and the drably-dressed armed guard who stood there.   
Only now there were two.   
One vampire.   
One vampaneze.   
"Address yourselves to the gate," the vampaneze guard barked.   
Mr. Crepsley, being the eldest, spoke first. "I am Larten Crepsley, come to seek council."  
"I am Gavner Purl, come to seek council."  
"I'm Eileen Shan, come to seek council."  
"The gate does not recognize you." The vampire said, examining my face.   
"She is my assistant. This is her first council." Mr. Crepsley said.   
"Do you vouch for her?" The vampaneze asked.   
"Yes."  
The two guards nodded to each other and stood aside. The vampaneze rapped on the large doors, and they creaked open for us to enter.   
"You excited?" Gavner nudged my arm, visibly excited for me to be experiencing Vampire Mountain for the first time.   
"Terrified," I muttered. "This is the place where I see if I'm really vampire material."  
"Everyone who steps through these halls for the first time shares your fear," Mr. Crepsley assured, setting a hand on my shoulder as we walked. "You will be fine here if you put forward your best effort. It will earn respect to your name if you are integral, courageous, and driven."  
"Being a good fighter doesn't hurt either," Gavner added.   
Mr. Crepsley nodded. "That is also important."  
"I don't know if I'm ready for that part..." I said uneasily. The further we walked, the more I could hear other voices in a crowd. Talking, laughing, shouting- it sounded like what you would hear on a busy street.   
"You will do well," my mentor assured. "We will train often to ensure it."  
  
The welcoming Hall of Osca Velm was alive with vampaneze and vampires alike. The Hall itself was warm with all of the bodies inside, and the black, soot-coated walls were all carved full of names of visitors in between the burning torches. I saw a vampire working to carve more names in and wondered if I could find my name later. There were several baskets of shoes on the walls for newcomers to pick from, and finding a pair in my size proved to be difficult as we searched for pairs to wear. Most were for men who were bigger than me.   
Though all in the same space, the vampires and vampaneze kept segregated by standing in groups away from each other. I noticed this everywhere I looked as followed Mr. Crepsley and Gavner through the mountain to the Hall of Khledon Lurt- the dining hall.   
We were hungry. We'd skipped several way stations on the last stretch of our journey so that we'd arrive quickly. It'd taken a month and a half to get here. The way stations we had stopped at were poorly stocked now that they had to cater to more travelers, and we'd been malnourished through most of the climb. That made sparring with Mr. Crepsley along the way all the more tiring.   
  
The Hall of Khledon Lurt was almost entirely packed full, and we'd had to wait for a little while to finally sit down to eat. Bread, hot cuts of meat, and steaming bowls of bat broth (which I'd declined) were provided- thankfully just enough to satisfy the hunger the three of us felt.   
"I've never been so happy to eat bread," I moaned through a mouthful of the warm, savory loaf I'd been given.   
"Should we give you some time alone with it?" Gavner laughed after practically chugging a jug of ale- enjoying that as much as I did with my bread. There were no cups or mugs here, so we had to drink straight from what was handed to us.   
"I do not think I have seen you eat so voraciously since we last had to camp in the wilderness," Mr. Crepsley noted.   
"I guess trees make me hungry," I replied impishly before my last bite of bread. I wiped the crumbs from my fingers onto the side of my pants and listened to the conversations around me.   
The guy on my left bragging about how he was strong enough to uproot a tree- average peacocking between men. The guy on my right was griping about how much space the vampaneze took up.   
I looked ahead of me, past Mr. Crepsley and Gavner, to the other side of the Hall. Vampaneze were still segregated here too. It was everywhere in the mountain. Thirty years of "unity" and it was as tense as a war zone.   
_This isn't what Evanna had her children for,_ I thought.  _Where are they in all of this...?_  
"-leen?" I focused back on Gavner when I realized he'd been trying to talk to me.   
"Sorry," I said. "I'm just taking it all in."  
Gavner smiled. "I was asking about what you think of it here."  
"I dunno yet," I answered, looking around at all of the uneasy people in the Hall. "It's so different from what I'm used to. The Cirque was so open and welcoming, but... I always thought Vampire Mountain was a place full of camaraderie and celebrations around councils. But this is more like an uncomfortable family dinner where everyone hates each other. I guess I dressed it up in my imagination."  
"No, you're not wrong," Gavner sighed. "It used to be a lot more comfortable here. Now nobody looks forward to coming."  
"On the contrary," Mr. Crepsley stared. "I have heard that everyone looks forward to destroying each other during the Festival of the Undead still to this day. Though it does nothing to create a brotherly bond between clans, as some had hoped. Even the fights are segregated."  
  
After we left the dining hall, we moved on to the hall of Oceen Pird. The gaming hall.   
"I don't think I should be here," I groaned as I followed the two through the hall. They'd decided to show me where I'd be learning to fight from now on. "Someone is gonna challenge me right here and now because I'm fresh meat and I'm either gonna get killed or humiliated, or both!"  
"There are many others here at your skill level," Mr. Crepsley assured. "You would not consent to an unfair fight, and it would be cowardly for someone to challenge you because they believe that you are an easy victory. "  
We walked by a room where the floor was hollowed out, and beams shaped in a large X were the only platform. A young looking woman was balanced on one of the beams, making slow, graceful movements which became sharp strikes at the air with her fists and bare feet.    
Tai Chi?  
She had pretty deep brown skin, and half of her dark brown hair appeared to be shaved off, the other half braided and lying over her shoulder. What I noticed above all else, was the large, distinct muscles in her arms.   
She didn't look much older than me from where I stood, but she was definitely more powerful- and could probably beat me down with one well-toned arm behind her back. Damn.   
"Who's that?" I asked. I had thought about seeing someone close to my age here before, but I didn't believe it was possible.  
"Thats Felina," Gavner said. "Another half-vampire. "Her mentor died a few years back, so she stays here and dedicates her life to getting strong. She was blooded even younger than you."  
"I can see that," I gaped, watching her pause to crack her back. She noticed me staring at her, and I quickly turned away- face red with embarrassment. "Let's keep moving."  
  
We walked along, eventually coming to the spot I'd imagined a million times before: the bars.   
"Now  _this_ is what I wanted to see!" I beamed, watching as multiple duals occurred on the various levels. Vampire and vampaneze alike, taking each other on with wooden staffs on mere balance beams.   
Mr. Crepsley had come to expect my extensive knowledge of vampire-related things; even the locations inside of the mountain. But Gavner seemed to be surprised each time I took away his chance to introduce the Halls to me.   
"Is she psychic? Because it's no fun taking a psychic on a tour." Gavner asked Mr. Crepsley as I watched the bars.   
"It is more complicated than that," he stated.   
"I'll explain it someday," I said, eyes scanning the bars for one vampire in particular.   
And there she was- Arra Sails in all her glory.   
I observed as she knocked much larger, much more muscular male vampires off of the bars as if it were easy. That's the only way I knew for sure that it was her. The men landed with heavy thuds each time one would hit the dust. I heard bones crack during several of the landings- _ouch!_  
I wanted to be as tough as Arra when I was little. Now I just wanted to survive a match with her someday.   
She climbed down after her last opponent had been knocked unconscious (or maybe dead) when he hit the ground, and wiped sweat from her face, neck, and chest with a rag.   
She noticed us and tossed the rag aside, striding over to us with her staff still in hand.   
"Larten, I didn't think you'd ever drag your sorry behind back here after how I'd demolished you last time." She gave him a cocky smirk, but I could see that she was happy to see him.   
Now that I could see her up close, I saw the many scars all over her arms, chest, neck, and face. She was strong looking, but not largely muscular like the vampiress I saw before- Felina. Her long, dark hair was tied back in a tight bun, and her gray eyes were as piercing as I'd always pictured. She was pretty, but in a very personal sense- like her strength, toughness, and ability to destroy anyone who challenged her made her attractive.  
"You know how I will always come back to you until I am victorious," Mr. Crepsley replied to her with a cocky look.   
Gavner groaned and leaned in to whisper in my ear. "Get a coffin- am I right?"  
I couldn't help but snicker at that and nod in agreement. The older vampiress noticed me standing behind my mentor and eyed me suspiciously before looking back to Mr. Crepsley. "Oh, you brought back a friend. I didn't think you were the kind of man who went after  _girls_ instead of grown women." I honestly couldn't tell if she was joking. I knew they still loved each other deep down, but I really didn't want her to think that I was even close to being something like a replacement for her.  
"Nonono, It's nothing like that, really. This old crab-ass is more like my  _dad_ than anything else," I said, earning a nasty look from my mentor. Arra, to my surprise, laughed at that.   
"She is only my assistant." He blushed.   
"Oh, _I know!_ " She smiled. "You're 'smooth', but not quite what this generation of women are looking for!"  
Nice to see that they seemed to be on good terms these days. I wondered how they'd gotten to this point. Flirting, pretending to be jealous- I'd have to ask Gavner about it later.  
"Arra Sails," she introduced herself.   
"Eileen Shan," I smiled, offering my hand to her. A reflex. She didn't even glance at it, instead examining me as if I were a statue. Then I remembered: she doesn't shake hands with anyone she doesn't respect. She fought with my dad just over a handshake. I withdrew my hand.  
"Is she participating in the Trials?" She asked.   
"I have yet to make that decision," Mr. Crepsley replied. "She is stronger than she looks, but perhaps another-"  
"I'm taking them before this council is over," I said.   
While Arra's expression remained the same, Gavner looked excited for me.   
And my mentor... well, he looked like he wanted to cuff the back of my head.   
"You won't survive," she said. It wasn't to put me down. She was simply stating what she felt she knew. "You're small, young, soft- It'd take a miracle."  
"I have a good teacher," I said.   
"Then lets see what you've learned," she turned to the bars and called out: " _Edwards!_ "  
One of the vampires who she'd previously left on the ground rolled onto his stomach and achingly stood up, groaning in response " ** _Whaaaaat!?_** "  
"Our new friend here wants to challenge you!" Arra shouted, not looking away from me but smiling when she saw my face twist into an anxious look. But I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of believing that I was weak because I was a kid!  
"You are going to get yourself killed if you speak out of turn like that," Mr. Crepsley groaned, rubbing the space between his eyes.  
"Have some faith in her, it'll at least be interesting to watch," Gavner tried to joke, but sounded just as uncertain as my mentor.   
"What, you want me to fight  _her?_ " The vampire, Edward, asked as he came close. He had a strong American accent and a lazy posture. He didn't appear much older than me either, but had dark circles under his eyes that made him look like a man in his thirties. He had a leering stare that made me uncomfortable. I already didn't like him just from how he stared at me like a piece of meat.   
"Yes, her. Show me you're at least half-decent enough of a fighter to beat her and I'll believe you have enough potential to keep training with me." Arra said, tossing him her staff.   
Edward didn't look like he was in the mood to continue, but he nodded and examined me. Trying to find a weak point- which looked like all of me, I'm sure.   
"This is a joke," he rolled his eyes at Arra. "Look at her, you're asking me to go at a little girl!"  
I eyed him right back.   
He was tall and wiry, not huge like some I'd seen so far. Good looking. He had wavy black hair, which he pushed away from his face- probably too vain to get it cut. His eyes were deep blue, and flecked with gray spots. He had several scars on his face and many on his hands. I would've thought he was attractive if he wasn't such a jerk.   
"I am  _not_ a little girl," I said sternly.  
He smirked. "Uh-huh. Just don't cry like one when you lose."  
"You've been put up to fight me because apparently Arra doesn't respect you as a fighter. Sooooo... What does that say about you?"  
That struck a nerve. He no longer leered, but instead looked ready to fight me before we even reached the bars.   
"Just get on the damn bars." He turned away from me and set about climbing up.   
"Nevermind what I said. Beat him into the ground," Mr. Crepsley said, glaring at Edward's back.   
"Gladly," I agreed, feeling some wind in my sails.   
I looked back to Gavner, who had retrieved a staff that seemed to be the right size for me. "Have you ever done anything remotely like this before?"  
"Kinda," I answered. "But I'm gonna wing it."  
Gavner gave me a quick rundown on how to best use the staff. Don't hold it from the middle, no wide hits, be quick, keep moving, guard myself and keep balance. Easy... sorta.   
I kicked off my shoes and climbed up onto the bars behind Edward. Vampires had good balance already, and my prior experience left me pretty well off right about now. Still, it'd been a while and I wasn't as coordinated as I was when I was twelve. Puberty had hit me like a brick wall and I became awkward and ended up quitting gymnastics- but I had to hope that sparring with Mr. Crepsley over the last couple of years had helped me even a little bit.   
  
I stood across from Edward on the bars, quickly finding my balance and tightly gripping my staff. My hands shook furiously while his seemed to be steady, but he stood up tall- which I hoped would come to my advantage.  
"Go!" Arra shouted, and Edward was already moving, swinging hard at me. I let out a shriek, stepping back from his range and jabbed at him with my own staff. I connected with his shoulder and he was pushed back- just enough!  
Gritting my teeth, I did what Gavner warned against without thinking: I took a wide swing, like if I'd been holding a baseball bat, and I swung at Edward as hard as I could.  
So hard, that my staff snapped in half when he'd blocked it with his own.   
We both gaped at it for a second. " _Oh, sh-_ "  
" _Nice!_ " He hooted, hitting me hard in the side of my head with his staff and almost knocking me over. I dropped to my knee instead, the sheer adrenaline making me get back up. I didn't lose my balance, but I felt blood leaking down the side of my neck. He'd hit me full force. A terrible headache blossomed to life in an instant. "Whoops, sorry, didn't mean to hurt you- much!"  
" _Screw you!_ " I shouted, manually slapping his arms out of the way (much to his surprise), then springing to my feet and hitting him in the same spot with all my strength using half of my broken staff. I hit his cheek instead and instantly left an angry red mark. He didn't stagger as much as I did, but he groaned in pain, growled furiously and shoved me back with his hand before swinging at me again.   
I dropped my own staff, grabbing his mid-swing without even thinking and following the momentum of his movement with a jump- landing on the side of the plank behind him and ripping the staff out of his hands all in one fell swoop! Spinning around as fast as I can, I swung low and swept his legs out from under him!   
He cried out and dropped to his knees but didn't fall.   
Before he could turn to face me, I had the staff in his face. I had him.   
"Are you ready to apologize yet?" I glared down at him.   
"Not quite," he answered, spitting blood and nursing his bruised cheek. "But I'm starting to think I like you."  
The anger inside of me burned like the sun. "Think about _this!_ " I barked, opting to shove my foot against his chest and knock him off the bar myself- something he hadn't anticipated. He cursed and fell like a sack of potatoes and couldn't manage to grab one of the bars to keep himself from falling.   
The fire inside of me died immediately when I heard the thud of his landing. And then I just felt guilty.   
" _Hot damn_ , way to go, Eileen!" Gavner hooted excitedly.   
"Ohmygod-- are you okay!?" I called, hand over my mouth in shock. I tossed the staff aside and hurriedly climbed down to check on him.   
He'd landed on his knees and moaned as he looked up at me. "Great!" He groaned and rubbed his sore cheek, muttering curses. "Fantastic! Just frickin' _peachy!_ " He wasn't _too_ hurt by the landing. It took higher heights than that to seriously injure a vampire. But it still put him in his place.  
When I was in front of him, he looked up to me again and looked ready to call me every name under the sun.   
But instead, when he looked at my face, his expression dropped. "I'm fine." He said, standing up. "My pride definitely hurts, but..." He groaned as he stood up and cracked his wrist. He must've hurt it on the way down.   
"As it should," Arra said. "You insulted her because of her outward appearance, completely disregarding that she may have put in work. More work than you. You owe this girl respect and an apology."   
Though she was putting up the same tough front, I could see some admiration in her eyes when she looked at me. She looked back to Edward. "I should've send in someone qualified. Go walk it off."  
She turned back to me with a sigh, then to Mr. Crepsley. "You must've trained her well after all," she said. Then she looked to me and said "keep working" before she began to follow after Edward.   
"Wait," I said, offering a hand to her again. I wanted that handshake. Arra's opinion meant a lot to me. Someone as strong as her could recognize strength in others, and I wanted to be strong enough to someday be her equal. I wanted her to see strength in me.   
"Why should I indulge you with this? One good fight does not make a warrior." She said.   
"Because someday I  _will_ be a warrior. A great one. And I'll prove it to you personally."  
She looked at me skeptically, hands on her hips- but there was an interest in her gaze. And I could see how she fought the corners of her lips from rising. Vampires loved fighting, and they loved challenges. Arra, being one of the best fighters who constantly tested herself to be better than her male counterparts, was no different.   
"Stubborn... She's a lot like you, Larten," she sighed and offered a small, sincere smile. She took my hand and shook it firmly. "Very well. I'll be looking forward to fighting you someday, Shan. You beat a more senior half-vampire who _I_ trained myself, so I respect that. But don't disappoint me by dying when you take the Trials."  
"You got it," I nodded. She nodded once in return and went to follow Edward back to the bars.   
"... She says I take after you. _Was that a compliment?_ " I gave Mr. Crepsley a sly look.  
His cheeks turned red and he shot me another dirty look. "You are in no position to joke when the side of your head is that bleeding like that."  
Oh right, I was bleeding. Now that my heart was no longer racing, I noticed the sharp throbbing pain in my skull and gently touched the swollen lump in my hair. My fingers came away red... Not sure how I'd ignored it for that long. It was terrible. "I think I need to lie down," I muttered, eyes growing tired.   
And then before I knew it, I was on the ground. 


End file.
